Blog 2.0

Yeah I had a blog once.
Back in the day, when it wasn't so cool. Really though, I was like 16 and it was a bunch of teenage whining.

THIS BLOG WILL NOT HAVE WHINING.

I feel like now that we are past the "livejournal" stage, whining should not be allowed on public websites.

The main reason I started this blog is because I have my degree in creative writing, and what have I done with it?!
Gotten a job in finance.

Sigh.

So this is really just my outlet to get some words out there, I'm not trying to be conceited, and I don't think anyone will read it. I just think my writing has fallen by the wayside, I used to be a really good writer!

COMMENCE BLOG POST #1 

So today a very odd thing happened. I walk outside my apartment, and low and behold, there is a fence on my car.
Yeah.
We have a fence that surrounds our dumpster, I'm not sure why, it doesn't keep anything out. Raccoons get in it, homeless people, and the occasional cat.
(I'm not lying about the homeless people thing either, one time I saw an almost naked, very large black man in my dumpster. He looked like the Old Spice Guy, sans horse body.)

Anyways, so I drive my boyfriend's Mercedes. He's kind of in love with it. The fact that he even lets me drive it is a small miracle in itself.
Anyways, so when I saw a fence on it, it wasn't a good feeling.

And then, I think, how did a fence even fall on my car?
It must've been raccoons.

This is the vision I get in my head.

(I think every blog should have images, but I can't draw.)

It was probably more than one. Maybe two or three evil, conniving raccoons. 

After some struggle, I move the stupid fence, almost scratch myself with the million nails that are sticking out, and realize that the car is all scratched up.

Damn raccoons. 

I get to work, galavanting around showing everyone what trauma I had to face this morning, and tell everyone that I think malicious raccoons did it.

And I go on thinking this the entire morning. 

Then I receive a lovely text from my boyfriend, and he goes "yeah, it was probably the trash truck, I bet it hit the fence."

Why didn't I think of this?

And then, the more I think about it, the more I realize that there is no way raccoons could've knocked over the fence. They're like, 10 lbs each. It would take an army of raccoons to knock that fence over. And even then, they would have to have some type of weapon or jetpack. 

The lesson here is obvious. Do not major in creative writing, and do not try and satisfy your writing urges by reading nonstop. You then think crazy things, like for instance, that two or three 10 lb raccoons could knock down a nailed in fence.